Test Anxiety Is Real. Here’s What You Can Do About It (At Any Age)

May 25, 2026

Let’s talk about something that doesn’t get enough attention during exam season: test anxiety.

Not the mild butterflies that come before any high-stakes moment. Real test anxiety, the kind that causes a student to go blank on a test they knew cold the night before, to feel physically sick on exam morning, or to cry in the car on the way to school. The kind that makes a capable, prepared student perform far below what they’re actually able to do.

Test anxiety affects students at every age and every level from the second grader dreading her end-of-year reading assessment to the junior who’s studied for six weeks but freezes when the AP® exam is placed in front of him. At Margot Tutoring Inc, we see it regularly, and we take it seriously. Here’s what every parent should know.

What Test Anxiety Actually Is

Test anxiety is a form of performance anxiety,  the fear of failure in a high-stakes situation. It can be triggered by past negative experiences with tests, family pressure, perfectionism, or simply the weight of what feels like a very important moment.

It’s not a character flaw. It’s not laziness. And it’s not something that will go away if a student just”tries harder.” In fact, telling an anxious student to simply calm down or work harder oftenmakes things worse

The good news is that test anxiety responds well to specific, targeted strategies and many of those strategies can be practiced at home.

How Test Anxiety Looks Different by Age

In elementary students , test anxiety often shows up as stomachaches, headaches, refusal to go to school on test days, crying, or excessive reassurance-seeking. Younger children may not have the vocabulary to say “I’m anxious about my test”,  instead they’ll say their tummy hurts or they don’t feel well. It’s worth taking these complaints seriously rather than dismissing them as avoidance.

In middle and high school students, test anxiety can look like procrastination, perfectionism, irritability, insomnia before exams, or going completely blank during the test itself. Some teens will tell you they’re anxious; others will simply seem withdrawn or unusually snappy in the days leading up to an exam.

Strategies That Actually Work

Before the test:

Preparation is the foundation. A student who is genuinely prepared feels less anxious. This sounds obvious, but it’s worth saying, sustained, organized studying over time is far more effective than cramming, and it builds the kind of confidence that holds up under pressure. At Margot Tutoring, we use brain-compatible learning strategies that help students actually retain what they study, rather than temporarily holding it in short-term memory.

Practice the conditions. One of the most effective ways to reduce test anxiety is to simulate the testing environment before the real thing. Sit down with a practice test, set a timer, put away all other distractions, and work through it as if it were real. The brain responds to familiarity  when the real exam arrives, it feels less unknown.

Develop a pre-test routine. Athletes have warm-up routines; students can too. A short walk, a specific breakfast, a few minutes of calm breathing, a consistent pre-test routine signals to the brain that it’s time to perform, not panic.

During the test:

Teach your child the “brain dump” strategy. As soon as the test begins, have them write down anything they’re afraid of forgetting, formulas, key dates, vocabulary words, in the margin. Getting it out of working memory and onto the page reduces cognitive load and eases anxiety.

Slow, deep breathing. This is not just a platitude. Slow diaphragmatic breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system and physically reduces the stress response. Even thirty seconds of slow, intentional breathing before beginning the exam can make a measurable difference.

Skip and return. Anxious students often get stuck on hard questions and spiral. Teach your child to mark difficult questions, move on, and return to them later. Forward momentum reduces panic.

After the test:

Resist the post-exam interrogation. Asking “How do you think you did?” immediately after a testcan extend the anxiety rather than relieve it. Give your child space to decompress, and affirmtheir effort before anything else.

When to Seek Additional Support
If test anxiety is significantly affecting your child’s performance or quality of life — if they’rehaving physical symptoms regularly, refusing school, or expressing extreme distress — it may beworth speaking with their school counselor or a mental health professional in addition toworking on academic strategies.

At Margot Tutoring, our academic coaching sessions include concentration strategies, study skills, and techniques specifically designed to help students manage the mental and emotional side of learning. You don’t have to navigate this alone.

Test anxiety is real. But so is the ability to work through it, one strategy, one test, one breath at a time.